Dinner with the Karate Hottie

Michelle Waterson sampled a juicy mango at a bodega near Faneuil Hall in Boston, on the eve of, UFC 161. You may know her sobriquet, "the Karate Hottie." Most of her fans don't realize she's also a leading wine maven. She went to dinner at a beautiful outdoor cafe in the North End with her husband. They ordered an $800 bottle of wine, but the waiter served them some swill. She took one sip and spit it out. Her eyes filled with poison and she yelled, "You'll rue the day you served me that piss!" She leaped over her table and grabbed Giuseppe by the scruff of the neck and screamed, "Do you take me for some rube?"

The tuxedoed man apologized profusely and ordered her a roasted Boston lobster with shiro ponzu butter, free of charge. She gobbled up the dinner, but it didn't temper her rage. When the waiter returned, she planted a sweeping roundhouse kick to the side of the head sending him over the rail. He bounced off the pavement and she said, "Whoopsie! I bet you have a waning sex drive, too - hah?"

"Don't you ever give me and my hubby short-shrift me again, little man," said Michelle. Every customer in the cafe was atwitter at the brouhaha. She gave them all the stink eye and said, "Have I satiated your need to pry into other people's business? It was absolute malfeasance that Mayor Walsh ever allowed this establishment to get a license." Her doting husband slipped Michelle's jacket over her shoulders with languid ease. As she left, she palmed a handful of dried fruits and crudites off of an elderly couple's table, shot a few of them into her mouth, and snarled at everyone staring at her as she left the establishment.

*****
Color words: bodega, sobriquet, maven, rue the day, eyes filled with poison, rube, gobbled, brouhaha, stink eye, shiso ponzu butter, waning, whoopsie, short-shrift, atwitter, satiate, malfeasance, languid, dried fruits & crudites